The Cape Cod Bridges are deathtraps!

The Cape Bridges are to people from suburban Boston what Southside Chicago is for anyone from the Midwest.  You basically cross the bridge or enter the Southside at your own risk.  You may survive, you may die, basically your fate is in a higher power’s hands. I just came back from the Cape on a family vacation so I had the utter joy of driving over the Cape Bridges twice in a week and I survived.  (thank you Allah! Uh oh this blog just got flagged by the Feds now, hey any publicity is good publicity right?) Driving over these things is legit probably the scariest and most life threating thing I have done in the past 10 years.  The lanes are so goddamn small because the fucking bridge was built in 1930 for Model T type cars and not for 18 wheelers and monster truck size SUVs.  Then traffic is zooming right at you from the other side because there is no fucking divider.  Also there is always the prick who thinks is a brilliant idea to switch lanes in the middle of the bridge and THEN there’s a sidewalk on the bridge which is the dumbest fucking thing ever.  It’s just inviting all people from southeastern Massachusetts who are suffering from chronic depression an easy out clause.  Can you imagine the meetings they had in the 1930’s, like the guy who spoke up and said “Hey I think a sidewalk should be included?”  WTF?  Who thought that was a good idea.? To top it all off when you get to the Cape side of the bourne bridge you get to experience the rotary which is always the biggest clusterfuck ever.  The guys who made these bridges were all hammered on the job, that’s the only excuse.