The unknown joys of having a 7 year old daugther is that you when you take them to the movies you get to see SING, instead of Star Wars. QUESTION: Who says "no" to a 1030 am showing of SING during Christmas vacation week? ANSWER: Anybody who is of sane body and mind would say no, only I would say Yes. A crowded theater packed with parents who don't want to be there and children who won;t shut up? Thats my idea of a grand ole time. Since the theater was packed we had to still in the second row, which was accompanied by the little one whining. Which was followed my mean dad coming out. "HEY! I paid $21.00 for these tickets, you WILL enjoy this movie!"
All that aside the movie was really good and I even had a few laughs myself. It's safe to say if you dont enjoy parts of this movie, then you dont like good music or cheap humour. My daughters favorite part was when a group of rabbits sang Sir Mix a lot "baby got back" and shook their butts. Their also was a YUGE uproar in the theater when an Ox got stagefright and farted on the stage. Not going to lie I probably laughed the loudest during that part. The voices you will recognize are Matthew McConaughey who plays the main character, who is a koala running a theater, Resse Witherspoon as a pig with 25 piglets, Seth MacFarlane as a mouse who loves 40's sintara music and my future girlfriend Scarlett Johansen as a punk rock hedgehog. I realize this movie is basically a rip-off of Zootopia and Disney is probably actively suing Illumination Entertainement as I write this, but who cares it's a fun flick. Dont rush to see it at the theory, unless you want to punish yourself like I did, but once it is on video, rent it because it is an enjoyable flick. I mean how can you go wrong with a movie that has a Gorilla singing Elton's John's "I'm still standing?"
So I've been on a roll with Netflix documentaries lately. I have the week off and I want to expand my mind mmmmmmmmmaaaaaaaaaaannnnnnnnnnnnn!!!!!!!
To be fair, I really didnt learn much. Other than their really is true evil in this world. YES I know ISIS and terrorism toward actually human beings is worse, than evil towards animals, but if you can kill an elephant just for ivory than you are an asshole. And its not like these poachers are hunting the elephant and using the whole animal for meat. They kill the elephant just for the tusks. The ivory goes to China and sells for thousands of dollars. I dont know what the answer is to the problem, but even if you dont watch this documentary, please do me a favor and DO NOT buy any ivory jewelry for yourself or loved ones. Overall the documentary was good, just seeing the elephants roam in HD on the African plains is worth watching. However it's very depressing seeing dead elephant carcasses. That is not an evil pill to swallow.
The Cuba Libre Story is an eight episode documentary series on Netflix. The documentary does not focus just on Castro, but the whole history of Cuba, from when the Spanish explorers first found the place in the 1600's to the current day. Which is a good thing, because all we ever hear about is Castro when we talk about Cuba. It was interesting to know what events led up to him becoming the dictator of Cuba. You also get to see how big of an asshole Castro was. Honestly he had no idea what he was doing, but at the same time he was a dictator so he never listened to anyone else (captain obvious here). He bascially became a communist because he needed Russian support to keep his crazy idea of communism alive. Then when the Soviet Union fell, he just became boys with Hugo Chavez to keep their crazy communist idea alive. At the very least, their is a small amount of redemption when you get to watch the sonofabitch trip and fall. Score one for capitalism here!
You also learn about Che Guevarra, who frankly I didnt know much about at all, he basically was Castros's vice president and then when Che disagreed with Castro about this relatons with Russia, Castro cast him aside. I dont get why left wing nut jobs love Che so much. Clearly not a great guy. This whole communism thing wasnt a good idea. I'll always remember the guys from Rage against the Machine wearing this shirt and me as a 13 year old kid saying "who's that guy?" well 24 years later I know. Clearly a communist loser, but still he had great hair. Gotta give him that.
Anyway back to the documentary. There are a lot of people from different parts of the world as experts in this documentary. So it is basically all subtitiles all the time and the other foriegn languages are not just Spanish. It's Spanish, French and German. That gets a little annoying, but all in all you learn a lot and you get to see how YUGE of an asshole Castro was. Hopefully America is doing the right thing in the future by re-opening relations with Cuba. I think I will be more optimistic once Raul Castro is finally dead. Then again if the Cubans ever get ahold of a $1 Trillion dollar bill communism on the island will never go away.
Sully is the best Clint Eastwood movie I have seen this "Gran Torino" Obviously anyone who watches the news already knows the story of Captain Sullenberger and the US Airways flight that had to land in the Hudson, but the movie is still a great movie. If you do not cry during this movie, then I think you should join ISIS. I'm kidding about that, but I'm an emotional guy, so seeing all the New York City transportation workers, paramedics and coast guard dropping everything to save the people in the middle of the river was amazing. After the last presidential election where people in America have basically stopped talking to each other, or stopped being friends with longtime friends over who they chose to vote for as president, which is all just nonsense to begin with, it was really good to see that deep down we are all human beings who will go to great lengths to save other people. People we don't even know, we are willing to risk our lives to save those people. All in all, enjoyable movie, even though it may make you cry, it's happy tears.
If you hate political correctness, you'll love Colin Quinn's latest comedy special "The New York Story". His latest comedy special is a comedian's view of the history of New York City. Instead of a boring college professor telling you about the how the Dutch first arriving in New York City by accident it is much more entertaining to hear Quinn's take on the history of New York City. He moves on to describe the Irish arriving, then the Germans, then the Jews, then blacks from the South, Puerto Ricans and basically every one from all parts of the world. Quinn argues that if we try to ignore somebody's heritage in the name of politeness, then we are ignoring what New York City so unique to begin with. He's not saying be racist and prejudice, but he's arguing that being politically correct does more harm than good. Basically being so crazy politically correct, makes up more uptight and bigger assholes as human beings, than just accepting people for who they are and not trying to realize we are different. New York City was basically found my accident and all different people coming to New York City from all different parts of the world makes New York City the world craziest accidentally experience. If you are a fan of his old show from the early 2000's "tough crowd" this comedy special is a must watch.
Ted Beneke is the one of the worst human beings on Breaking Bad. We forgot how much of a scumbag this guy was, because there were so many other YUGE pieces of shit on this show. Tuco, Saul. Walt, Todd, the nazis, just the worst of the worst when it comes to human beings. You almost forget how big of a piece of shit Ted is. And with all those guys I just mentioned, we expected them to be bad. Tuco, Todd and the nazis are just vile human beings involved in organized crime. Saul is a shady lawyer and of course Walt, well the whole show is named after him.
Yet Ted seems to get a free pass. He's the guy that Bernie Sanders was ranting and raving about during his campaign. The corrput 1%, not paying his fair share. Not only was he cooking the books and not paying his taxes, but he was sleeping with a woman, who's husband has cancer, has a disabled teenager son and a baby. Well sleeping with Skyler is 1/2 on her, but still you think Ted with his wealth could find another woman. But maybe thats the point, he acts like he is wealthy, but really has no wealth at all. The guy gets thousands of dollars handed to him and he doesnt even pay his taxes, which he should do to avoid being criminally charnged, and goes out and buys a new car,,, and NOT something economical but a freaking BMW. Way to fly under the radar Ted.
The guy acts squeaky clean, but he is a dirty businessman. Unlike Gus he is a dirty businessman who has no plan. He just wants to live the high life without playing by the rules. Then again if the US Goverment did not have so many job killing regulations and such a complex tax code, Ted would not be portrayed as a criminal. HMMMM. Well anyhow my ruling is till Ted is one crooked son of a bitch and he kind of deserved his fate, for not doing the right thing for his company and employess and for Sklyer. I mean in the end if does not really matter for Sklyer, because at the end of the series she loses everything and is working for a cab company and living in public housing, ... Whoops.
Will Ferrell's career has bascially been playing an idiot all the time and he nails that role in this movie, but its not just him that makes the movie. It's Tyrion Lannister before he was Tyrion Lannister, Artie Lange as Santa Claus and Buddy the Elf's friends in the North Pole. Now that I have kids and I take them to visit Santa, the 1st thing that comes to my mind is SANTA! I KNOW HIM! Classic line, classic Christmas movie.
And of course Santa smells like beef and cheese;
And my personal favorite, Mr. Narwhal:
Home Alone
This movie came out when I was 10 and to this day I am still dumbfounded how it did not win Best Actor, Best Film, Best Director and Best Adapted Screenplay in 1990. The Oscars voters are a bunch of stuck up assholes. I dont know what else more I can add for this movie. Its a winner from start to finish, as you can tell just by watching the whole movie in 2 minutes.
Christmas Vacation
The first time I saw this movie I must of been 14 or 15 and I probably urinated in my pants 5 times. The part where Cousin Eddie is emptying the sewage of his trailer into the street and saying "Merry Christmas, Shitters Full" will never ever get old. What can I say I have a juvenile sense of humour.
Other classic lines. Todd and Margo are the worst human beings alive in this movie, which is another reason the movie is do damn great.
Clark saying he would not be more surprised if his face was sewed to the carpet.
And last but not least the Jelly of the Month membership as a Christmas bonus.
I've been seeing the trailer for a new movie with Bryan Cranston so naturally I have been thinking a lot about Breaking Bad lately. In my personal opinion Breaking Bad is the best televsion show of all time and that show revolutionized television. It basically started the whole "binge - tv watching" craze. But one of the reasons that show was so damn good, is becasue so many things are left unanswered. Crazy 9 was killed in the third episode of the show and I still can't figure out what Walter did with his body. I know it is IMPLIED Walter made Krazy-8 disappear by putting his body in some hyrdochloric acid. But I dont think that is how Walter solved that problem. When Jesse and Walt got rid of Emilio's body they used all the hyrdochloric acid that Walt stole from the high school. And we know how that turned out in episode 2.
So now all the hyrdochloric acid is gone and its not like Walt can rob the high school again. Beside how much hyrdochloric acid would a public high school have? I'm going out on a limb here, but I'm saying not too much. I think Walter took Crazy-8's body to the desert and buried him in the middle of nowhere. Some place where no one would go. Basically the same place where he buries his money at the end of the series. Why do you think Walt went to the middle of nowhere to bury his money? Probably because he has been there before. Also remember when he buried his cash, he went alone. He didnt take Huel, or Bill Burr's character, that means there is something there he is trying to hide. Otherwise, walt takes those two guys w/ him to help bury the cash. In conclusion, I beleive Krazy 8 was buried in the desert and his body was was not disolved in hyrdochloric acid.
Something on my mind while driving to work today.Breaking Bad Season 4.When the cartel attacks the Los Pollos
Hermanos truck first, Mike hides in the back and then when the cartel opens the
back door he shoots the two cartel attackers. (see video below, this is at the beginning of episode 4)
The driver is
dead, the 2 cartel guys are dead, leaving only Mike w/ the mess.The DEA never finds out about this.I think we can assume Mike called Gus and
some of Gus other guys helped him "clean the mess." OK I am fine w/
this. HOWEVER two episodes later the
cartel strikes again, kills the driver and locks the back door of the truck.They put a tube from the exhaust pipe into
the back of the track and the two guys in the back die from breathing all the
CO2 and no Oxygen. After they die the Cartel leaves takes one case of fried
chicken batter than has a sticker on it, that they know is the case that has
meth in it. How in the holy hell did the police not ever find that truck?You got 3 guys dead on the side of the road.
The driver and two of Gus's guards in the back.How did Gus's guys clean that up before
anyone contacted the authorities?Someone must of passed that truck and seen it?
Also if no one ever reported it to the authorites. You now have two missing drivers for Los Pollos Hermanos. GONE. VANISHED. Don't you think Hank or someone else at the DEA could of figured that out? not one, but two trucks from Los Pollos Hermanos were robbed and the drivers shot and killed? If this was real life, that be non stop on Fox News/CNN. Hell Trump would use that during his campaign speeches as another reason to build the border wall.
"we got YUGE problems in this country folks, fried chicken restaurant drivers are being shot and killed by people that are in this country illegally."
One time you can see as a random act of violence, but when the same company gets robbed 2x, and it gets robbed violently then you got to start questioning why the cartel is only going after Los Pollos Heramanos trucks and not, lets say's KFC trucks. DAMN YOU VINCE GILLIGAN!!!!!! I demand an answer!
Peaky Blinders is a BBC show that airs on Netflix after the crazy brits get to watch it on the other side of the pond. So far there have been three seasons. Each season is 6 1 hour episodes so if you have not watched those seasons, please take the time and watch them. I always tell people that Peaky Blinders is the British version of the Sopranos. It takes places in the 1920's so there is the cool historical aspect to the show as well. The British accents on the show are very thick, so do yourself a favor and put on the closed captioning when watching this show. If you have not yet wathced season three, please stop reading now.
Ok season 3 turns out to be my favortie season of Peaky Blinders. I was really happy when Polly shot Inspector Campbell at the end of season 2. That meant we could move from that story and Tommy and Grace could go on with their lives. The story line of Campbell being a pain in the ass for the Peaky Blinders was getting kind of old and the writers of the show did the right thing by closing that storyline and opening a new one. What better way to pick up a storyline then have the Russian mob and a Russian princess involved? Answer their is none.
Of course Tommy's life cant be all fun and games because two episodes into the episode Grace is killed by the italian mob by and Tommy is now a man raising a kid alone. I know they get payback on the Italians but then the rest of the season is basically Tommy trying to steal some jewels for the Russians. Peaky is one of these shows where I get so confused in the storyline but I cant stop watching. The last episode of season 3 was great. That bastard priest finally is killed by one of the Peaky Blinders and Tommy returns the jewels to the Russians. We can tell the Russian princess was using Tommy all along because she makes him pay for the time he had sex with her. So I am not sure if she returns in Season 4. I think she comes back and turns out to be another Grace for Tommy. Maybe the russians and the blinders come together. Personally I'm rooting for the return of Princess Tatiana because she's a stone cold fox. (GIGGITY!)
As for the final scence in Season 3. Why did Tommy rat out his own family out? I think he's trying to protect them. I think if they go to jail instead of break up they are more protected then going out on their own. I think he also realizes that life of a gangster is a life long commitment. His brother Arthur can't just call it a day and move to America and go to the beach like his girlfriend tells Tommy. I think if Arthur does leave to America, they start smuggling booze to America. Remember it's the 1920's and booze is illegal in America at the time. Thats my guess on where the season may head for season 4. Now the moment of truth.
I am a big history dork so I like to watch documentaries. It's good to learn something new and interesting while never picking up a book or leaving the couch. I am fascinated with World War 2 so when I saw this documentary on Netflix I gave it a shot. It's two 45 minute episodes and it was originally put togehter by the BBC. The narrator is obviously a British guy so you have to deal with the snooty accent, but its not that bad. This documentary goes into how FDR had polio at an older age and was never able to walk after his diagnosis. However he was seen as an up and coming politican in the 1920's and if you could not walk, people would see you as weak and not even consider voting for you. He had to get his legs fitted with iron leg locks to hold him up right so we could speak at political conventions. People would have to help him walk and he basically had to keep his paralysis a secret from the public in order to have people vote for him. After we wins his 1st term as president in 1932 the documentary goes straightforward to 1944 and shows FDR running for a fourth term. He was a very, very sick man in 1944 and I can not imagine him winning today being that sick. (I just remeber when Hillary Clinton coughed people were losing their minds.) FDR had polio and a failing heart. He won the 1944 election and then worked tirelessly until his death to found the United Nations. He wanted to found the United Nations in order to avoid another World War. (so far. so good) but in order to found the United Nations he needed the backing of Winston Churchill and Joseph Stalin. Two completely opposite people. Unforunately FDR died in 1945, but because of his death and Stalins relationship with FDR, Russia agreed to found the United Nations with the US and Britain. It's interesting how FDR and Churchill had a relationship with Stalin, since he was clearly a sociopath, but I guess you can say he was the lesser of two evils compared to Hitler. Also the documentary talks a good amount about Eleanor Roosevelt. Apparently it was not a rumour that Eleanor was a lesbian, but at the same time FDR was not loyal as well. Not sure how a guy that is paralyzed is having extramartial sex with two other woman, but it happened. Ladies love power I guess. Final note: The narrarator says FDR, refered to Eleanor's lesbian companions as "the she-males". He liked Eleanor's lady friends a lot, but he still called thim that. In today's world FDR would of been impeached for that choice of words.
Overall don't bother watching it if you don't like history. But if you are a history nerd like myself, especially when it comes to World War 2, give it a watch.
I saw a small clip about this new comedy special on Netflix on the twitter machine last week. The clip I saw was pretty damn funny, so I decided to give the whole special a watch. I was not disappointed. The topics Michael Che hits on are gentrification, homophobia, racism, Donald Trump, gun violence, Hitler and Black Lives Matter. His comedic takes on all these issues were unexpected and funny. For example, Che is not a Trump supporter but he likes Donald Trump. His reason is that you always need that one over confident buddy in your group of friends. We all know that guy and Trump is that guy. Also Michael Che involves two guys from the crowd as part of his routine. That part of the special impressed me, because he took two random guys from the audience and made it a really funny part of his act. All in all the special is 60 minutes long and I laughed out loud for about 57 of those 60 minutes.
Alright I realize everyone and their mother has watched this show, so writing a review about it is pretty damn dumb, we all know the show is straight fire. I think the goal of this show, from the perspective of the big wigs at HBO, is to have Westworld be the franchise of all the HBO programming after Game of Thrones hangs it up in a few years. Game of Thrones has two short seasons left. The next one is due to come out in Summer 2017 and I think the last one will come out shortly after that. Let's say Spring 2018. At this point you'll see Westworld come back. It's not due to come back until 2018, since in my opinion, I do not think the executives at HBO had much confidence that the show was going to be a smash hit. Well it was and we can not complain that it will not come back for another 18-24 months. There is plenty of other stuff on TV to watch to keep us occupied. (you could also start a hobby other that watching TV, but that would take to much effort) If you have not watched it, please do and do not read past this sentence. To everyone who has seen it, get ready to have your mind blown.
The acting of Ed Harris and Evan Rachel Wood was awesome, and Anthony Hopkins was so damn good. Extra showouts to the girl
who played Maeve and the guy who played Bernard/Arnold. All around just great acting and all the special effects were great too. I can not praise this show enough. But now I wanted to write about mind blowing aspects of the show that I can not figure out and cause my mind to melt.
Arnold/Bernard:
I get that Arnold is one of the founders of Westworld. I also get that he programmed Dolores to kill him, because he did not want Westworld to go active and Dr. Ford disagreed with him. But how come Dr. Ford creates another robot that looks exactly like Arnold and just renames him Bernard? I know Dr. Ford is a bit of psycho so he does not think it's a big deal to change his name, but some one else out there had to know Arnold was Bernard. Did we all just agree to not call Arnold, Arnold anymore?? We know Arnold worked with other people, as we see Dolores in the hallway of the office and one random guy doing into Dr. Arnold Webers office. So how come no one seems to question Arnolds name change?
Armistice:
Armistice is a bad ass character. We can all agree on that. But what is the point of the full body snake tattoo? Why put all the extra effort into the snake tattoo for her? The tattoo is not programming it is just a feature to her character. Also we know Armistice is a new robot, since William, when he is the man in black, claims he has never seen her before. So that means Arnold did not create her at all, Ford created Armistice. She clearly has no fear and is seen as an ally for Hector, if not the leader of the gang in Westworld. I think here is a hidden meaning to her tattoo that may be brought up again in season 2.
3. Felix:
I think Felix is a robot. He just knows too damn much about the place. He gets refered to as a "butcher" by Sylvester and is mocked for tryiing to code a bird, but he basically pulls off coding the bird. Which tells me he knows more than Sylvester is givng him credit for. Sylvester is smart and knows what is going on but is always hesitant to do anything, because he does not want to lose his job. Slyvester is a human, no doubt in my mind, but Felix I think is a robot. He justs knows to damn much not to be and he obeys basically everything Maeve tells him to do. No pushback what so ever. Time will tell if I am right about this theory,but as of now I agree with my theory.
4. Stubbs and Elsie:
Are they dead or are they alive? And if they are dead, are they DEAD DEAD or did they get re-created as robots? My call; Elsie is now a robot and Stubbs is dead. Why did Ford re-create Elsie as a robot? Because she's smart as fuck and knew way more than even Ford expected. He can trust her with the park beyond his years. Maybe she'll challenge Charlotte in the future? I just can't see someone like Elsie disappearing from the series. Stubbs was not as interesting as a character in my opinon as Elsie, but he could sense someting FUBAR was going on in the park. However if Ford has no problem killing Theresa, why would he be hestiant in not killing Stubbs? Sorry Stubbs, it was good run buddy.
5. William:
The guy who played William did an excellent job, but every time I saw young William all I could think about was Liam McPoyle from Always Sunny. Such a damn creep, you can not outlive that character.
Thats all I got, and finally time to grade the show.
Did I want to see "Moana" last week? No, not really, but when you are the father of two girls and they have a cousin sleep over and it is raining and cold outside and you live in a small house, spending $55 to get out of the house seems like a great idea. From the points of the movie I saw when I wasn't telling my kids to sit down, this movie was OK, and I'm grading on the kids movie scale, I'm being realistic here. The story is a little weird. Basically the girl who plays Moana is going to be the princess of her island nation. However the tribe that she rules on the island can no longer find fish to eat and all their fruit crops are dying. So Moana's grandmother tells her that she needs to get rid of some sort of curse. Moana being the pain in the ass teenager she is, says she won't do it. Of course, since this is a Disney movie the grandmother dies and Moana changes here mind. She's goes out to the ocean and finds Maui. He is the guy in the picture above and voiced by "The Rock".
Anyway The Rock's character is some sort of mythical god that helps Moana fight some other demon. This is the part of the story where I got lost, again I'm sure it's an easy storyline but as I said I was telling my kids to sit down and I forget what happened. All in all they fight a bad guy, defeat the bad guy and when Moana returns to her island home the fruit crops are now healthy and the tribe can fish the waters again.
Frozen , Zootopia and Wreck it Ralph were 5x better than this movie. The story line was OK and the songs were not as good as other Disney Flicks. It is not a giant turd, but compared to other movies of Disney's past it wasn't as good. So don't rush to the theaters with your kids to see it, wait till it hits the Redbox and you only have to pay $1.29 to rent it. (Yes I still rent DVD's, I know its 2016 but don't judge, I like saving $.) Lastly this is the one song that got stuck in my head. The girl who plays Moana has a great voice, but what is weird about the songs in this flick is that the Rock sings one too. It was really odd.
